The Solution

The solution is to first, identify the part of the problem that is our own, and to commit to healing through the gentle, honest, firm and loving self-parenting we give ourselves. We've taken a giant step today; we're here. Next, we expose our problems to the light of day. We talk about our problems in the clearest and most honest terms at our disposal.

Dealing with our rage is a component of our healing process. We may need help getting to this feeling because our anger has been repressed. To assert ourselves in our own behalf is to give up the victim role. We were victims once, we are not, nor do we have to act like, victims now.

We express and slowly work through the feelings of rage to relieve our hostile attitudes toward life. What happened to us is not, nor will it ever be okay. However the awareness of how disturbed a perpetrator or someone who abuses children is, may or may not be a part of our spiritual recovery.

We had no responsibility for what happened to us. We were victims. We had no control over what other people did.

Now, we express what happened. We put it "outside" of ourselves, where it belongs, and begin to "separate" from the abuse. We look at it. sort it out, and feel what the experiences and the environment that supported those experiences had on our lives.

We admit that trying to control, juggle, or manage our feelings inside, leaves us out of control. The struggle to keep fear, rage and pain safely hidden inside of us is overwhelming. Old coping mechanisms no longer work. Up until now, most of us tried to take responsibility for what happened to us and for our "and their" recovery from it. Now we need to really feel what has been going on inside of us as a result of the sexual abuses to us and how to recognize how it influences us today. Recognition of the "blocks" we have to living our lives due to our opinions of ourselves that are connected to the abuses we experienced, will help overcome those blocks.

Work, and action steps, take us to creativity, spontenaity, productivity, and feelings of healing. We are developing a new history, where we, with God's grace, are in charge of our choices, our responses, and our "selves". Instead of over-reacting to outside stimuli, we can make decisions that are in our own self interest to allow us to feel happy and free.

In association with books, music and videos recommended by Don't Fall Until You See the Whites of Their Lies.

ACOA Redondo Beach incest survivor MBW Family known for genealogy, Harry Potter Easter Party, wedding pranks, divorce pranks, redhead jokes,  the Oh No A Bear Picture, Colorado resident Marvin the Martian, Spirituality Stories, Casper, Amaryzingrace's Tweety, Angela's Taz, Brittny's and Drew's Angelica and Tommy from Rugrats Playground.  The guys won't want to miss my co-worker and model Marina Blackwell's photo gallery.